According to wikipedia:   A rhetorical question is a figure of speech in the form of a question posed for its persuasive effect without the expectation of a reply (e.g.: "Why me?")^[1] Rhetorical questions encourage the listener to think about what the (often obvious) answer to the question must be. When a speaker states, "How much longer must our people endure this injustice?", no formal answer is expected. Rather, it is a device used by the speaker to assert or deny something.
   I held a family meeting. The theme - Manners/Etiquette and Common Courtesy. I began the meeting with the kids offering suggestions of what the theme included. They came up with: 1. using Please, Thank You, and I am sorry (excellent - 9 and 4 years of indocrination have had the desired result!) 2. No biting/kicking/ scratching/hiting/etc (this was offered by the 4 year old who still resorts to the afore mentioned actions when she is frustrated) - this led us to the Grand Picture - In essence - what she was saying was - FOLLOW THE GOLDEN RULE - "Treat Others, How You Want To Be Treated."
  At this point in the meeting Ellah (4) was done and wanted to return to her movie. Lishai (9) wanted to know why she had to stay. "If all Ellah gets out of this family meeting was The Golden Rule - then that is enough, you are 9 and can comprehend and absorb more - so sit back down," was my response.
  I then went on to include - ***Listening without interupting***, ***Allowing others to go first***, and ***Respecting Elders (aka no talking back)***.
   I asked her what the consequence would be if she broke the new family Etiquette rules and she stated: no tv/computer for a week. "Um, yah, No." I answered, "That doesn't work."
   Rather - a Rewind/Redo (an opportunity to address the behavior/words/actions and change the response) and if you chose not to have a Redo/Rewind - then you can write 100 times "I will not disrespect" or "I will not interrupt" - or "I will follow the Golden Rule". Good ole' fashioned school punishment inspired by the evil Ms. Umbridge from book 5 of the Harry Potter series sans the blood offering.
  Lishai immediately freaked out ran out of the room screamed - I hate you! and threw herself on the bed and sobbed hysterically. After 5 minutes I went and said, "It is interesting to me that we are not talking about the present, rather something in the future - you haven't done anything yet and yet you seem to know that you will break the rules and then refuse the Redo and you are freaking out about a consequence (nice word for punishment) that hasn't arisen yet!
  She calmed down and in the ensuing week, I have become aware of the way, we as parents talk. And I have come to a conclusion - Rhetorical speech to children leads to Frustration and undo consequences.
I noticed that my husband Always speaks to the girls in Rhetoric - and they Do Not Get It!
They think they need to answer the question and then he thinks they are talking back:
"Why are your clothes on the floor?" "Why haven't you picked up your toys?" "Why did you pick up the hot plate? Didn't you know you would spill it?" "It is time to clean up, okay?"
The Best Advice Ever - PARENTS - STOP IT! BE AWARE OF HOW YOU PHRASE YOUR WORDS.
WORDS ARE POWERFUL AND EFFECTIVE - when used correctly. Teach your kids at the appropriate time 8-9 possibly what a rhetorical question is - but refrain from its usage - I am telling you - I am dropping serious wisdom here - heed it!
Happy New Year!